Sunday, January 13, 2013

A Little Bit About Me


My name is Brandi.  I turned 40 years old this past July.  I am married and have four of the most amazing children on the planet!  If you follow me, over time, you will see that I wear many different hats, but the one I am the most proud to wear is “Mom”.  I have three boys and one girl.  My oldest, Mitchell, is 20 years old.  Next is my daughter, Jensen.  She is 17 years old.  Then, I had my sweet boy, Kameron, who is 15 years old.  Lastly, and the one that took nine years of begging my husband for, is my little angel, Seth, my 5-year-old baby boy.  They are my greatest masterpieces. 

I still live in the same town I was born in … same town I graduated from high school … same town I will most likely die in (although I wouldn’t have admitted that about ten years ago).  My family and I have moved a few times.  We first moved to Broken Arrow, Oklahoma … then to Kansas City, Missouri … then to Lawton, Oklahoma … and finally back to Sapulpa.  It’s comfortable here.  It is the place I feel the most connected … and the place I feel the most loved.  My family is here.  My friends are here.  My heart is here.

After high school, I attended the University of Tulsa for a few years.  Well, a lot of years actually.  I have racked up a LOT of credit hours, but changed my major from pre-med/biology to art.  Art is truly where my passion is.  I’m still not sure why I didn’t pursue my degree in art from the very beginning.  Maybe because I knew it would be difficult to make a career out of it, and I knew I certainly couldn’t be a teacher.  I have the utmost respect for teachers, truly.  I also know that I could never hack it.  Children everywhere should rejoice that they will never have me as their teacher.  I was very close to having my Bachelor degree finished, but I started to juggle too much in life at once, and my education was pushed aside.  Maybe someday I’ll go back.  I would certainly love to have my Bachelor of Fine Arts in Art degree from the University of Tulsa.  Ahhh, to have that beautiful piece of paper hanging on my wall … that is just another one of my big dreams.  Someday. 

I am self-employed and work from home, which is nice, because it seems like I’m always running to appointments somewhere for someone.  My job, however, is slowly being replaced by computers, and finding new accounts is becoming increasingly difficult.  I have been very successful in this field, but I also know that I need to start focusing on myself, my life, and my family.  For 18 years, I have focused on work and making as much money as possible so I could provide the very best for my family.  Little did I realize that while I was focusing on work, thinking blindly that everything else was just fine, my life was becoming a mess.  Being self-employed, if I don’t work, I don’t get paid.  The harder I work, the more money I make.  The more hours I work, the more money I make.  I never realized how much my job was costing me until recently.  It is time that I can never get back to spend with my children.  Time I can’t get back to take a REAL vacation with my family.  Time I can’t get back to spend with my husband.  Now, it’s time I put my life back on track.  It’s time to stop making excuses – no more saying, “I can’t.  I have to work.”  I’m not getting any younger, and my life isn’t becoming any less complicated. Everything always seems to fall into place … I’m hoping that this does as well. 

Now, when I say that my life is full of chaos, I mean it.  I also said that I would provide every “ugly, embarrassing, beautiful detail” along the way.  I will … pictures and all.  I also said it would start with one rather drastic change … and it did.  I’ll show a picture of that, too. 

Just stay tuned …

Saturday, January 12, 2013

2013 Social Media Tulsa Conference and #SMTulsa


I used to be organized and in control of my life.  My CDs were alphabetized.  My clothes were arranged in my closet in groups – tank tops, t-shirts, long-sleeved shirts, sweaters, and sweatshirts.  Those were then placed in order of least favorite to favorite.  I did the same thing with pants, jeans, skirts, and dresses.  I had things filed away in perfect order.  I had my own, unique taste in things.  I didn’t need anyone’s approval or permission.  I didn’t need anyone to hold my hand.  I was responsible for my own happiness, and I knew how to achieve it.  Somewhere between high school and age 40, however, I became lost in my own chaos.  The previous two years have been difficult, to say the least.  I knew that something had to give … and soon.  I had to emotionally hit rock bottom and be willing to let go of everything that was once so important in order to begin to find ME again – the me that I have so desperately missed.

It all happened in one single evening, one single conversation when everything became crystal clear.  It was my epiphany.  That night, I decided it would start with a single, albeit drastic change.  I needed to start controlling the chaos, and I knew I would need to document it to keep myself on track.  I want to keep my journey honest and hold myself accountable to my dreams.  I am, after all, a dreamer!  I know the ride will be bumpy, and there will be days when I will doubt myself and just be tired of it all again, so I need this to remind me where I was, how far I have come, and where I eventually want to be.  It’s not that I think I’m that interesting really, but there are some unique aspects of my life that I plan on talking about, because it ALL needs to be sorted out and dealt with.  I’m going to just throw it all out there - every ugly, embarrassing, beautiful detail – because after all, that’s how I ended up in this dark place, and sugar-coating it certainly won’t fix it.  This is going to start out as a one-year challenge – to see how much I can accomplish in regaining control of my life and finding the best parts of ME again.  This is MY journey … and if others want to come along for the ride with me, then let’s go! 

Conveniently for me, the 2013 Social Media Tulsa Conference is coming up (March 21-22), and I think that it would be the best place to start to learn the ins and outs, dos and don’ts, and ups and downs of social media and blogging.  I’m hoping that it will provide me with direction and the tools to make my blog, my journey, the very best it can possibly be.  Maybe I'll even make some new friends!  

In case anyone is interested, you can find out more here:
http://socialmediatulsa.org/


So, ready or not … it’s time.

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Day One ...


Today marks the beginning of a new phase.  A new me.  A BETTER me.  A me I can be proud of.  It is way overdue.  

It was a productive day actually ... but not without a glitch or two.  As much as I would like to elaborate and go into the details of how I ended up here, I'm exhausted.  SO much more to do ... and I've only got 364 more days to find the life I've been dreaming of.  This is a ME project that is rather large.  I'm expecting a lot from myself, but I want to accomplish it in one year.  Or ... at least Phase One.  Day One of Phase One.  

So until next time ...